searching for my sun

To-do list for fandom:

1. khr_exchange fic
-- DFHFGH OUT OF MY FORTE. SO OUT OF IT. /sobs
-- DEADLINE: DECEMBER 22

2. BAND AU OF EPIC AWESOME with pollinia and theburningempty, the Yamamoto and Gokudera to my Hibari.
-- OKAY GUYS WHAT IS THE STRUCTURE OF THIS

3. khr_undercover fic
-- DEADLINE: FEBRUARY 12

4. WINDSHEAR oh god DFHFGJ
-- HOW LONG IS THIS FAGGOTRY OH MY

5. SURFACING ending + epilogue
-- DO THIS SOMETIMES THIS YEAR god, self

6. Sekrit project of immense awesome (and will probably be epic) with Kaga my love

7. The Way of the King (Hibari-as-the-Vongola-Tenth fic/community/WHAT?!)
-- Oh god I'm so lazy with this

8. absolute_hold RP
-- I need to stop neglecting this lmfao

OH MY GOD

KHR WHY ARE YOU KILLING ME WITH IDEAS

I love all you awesome people who plot with me and indulge my crazy ideas. ♥

ALSO: DEADLINES

I FINISHED THE ATWOOD FIC

I FINISHED THE ATWOOD FIC

Oh god I can stop having my ass so badly kicked by a fic right now /sobs

I will post it after editing omg. This is just.

Most work I've put into a fic ever I swear.

ATWOOD WHY IS YOUR VOICE SO HARRRRRRD

AAAAAAAAAAAAAH

WRITING IN ATWOOD'S VOICE IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE DFXGFDH Y DO I DO DIS TO MYSELF

/WRISTS

Pollililili? YOUR FAULT. Enabler. /sobs

Oh god how am I going to do this. It's more than just Atwood it's- Hibari. As a girl. In first person. In Atwood's voice with conjuctures and metaphors and-

There is something between the two of us; a history – they like to call it that, history – that runs for longer than this government has been alive.

The door opens and the Commander steps in, closing the door behind him. He leans against the door. We are both looking at him, and I know he can feel the tension in the room, heavy and poisonous. But he doesn’t admit it; he never does. The bedroom is the Wife’s domain, and the Commander has no authority here.

Or so they say. Lies, of course, just to placate the Wives and keep them quiet. Humans are stupid creatures – give them a little power, give them someone to lord over and they will remain your obedient slaves. Herbivores believing that they are carnivores; that they are more than prey.

Only the Commander holds power in this house.

***

There is an umbrella rack beside a door: black for the Commander, blue for the Commander’s Wife, and red for me. Our lives are colour-coded, neatly compartmentalized with premade rules that I can't change or fight against.

There’s no sign of rain today – the sky is bright blue like the umbrella. (We depend on the skies for weather reports, nowadays. There’s no radio or television, and the Internet is a pipe dream.

Progress.)

sdgfdh

/screams forever

GUYS TELL ME IF IT MAKES SENSE/IS IC. Or something. I have enough friends in the KHR fandom right right right?!

/headsmashes

guys.

I'm writing a Handmaid's Tale AU of KHR

With Hibari as Offred- or rather. Ofdino.

Dino is, of course, the Commander

Yamamoto is- Nick

Reborn is involed. As in Chrome. Mukuro. There is even yakuza in this shit wtf I- and there's Gokudera

There is genderswitch and fucked up AU and this is going to be so- crack. Except it's not really crack because dshdh ANGST

Reborn why are you in this thing

WHY IS THERE PLOT

/sobs

And uh, ficbit or something:

I let myself into the room. I'm not supposed to - there are a lot of things that I'm restricted from - but he has broken the rules already and I try to rebel as much as I can. Even when chained, I can still move; can still strain.

He is seated behind his desk. There's an ashtray on the table - my eyes are drawn to it and I think how easy it will be to brain him with it. It looks heavy, made of ceramic and none of it is plastic. His skull will crack, I think, blood and brain matter flowing into blond hair, muting that disgusting colour.

But I have been careless; he notices my gaze. His finger moves the ashtray away, into a drawer and I take note of it, slot the information inside my mind. He is my ringmaster, and I intend to break him; break my chains.